Enemies to Lovers with E. Kaiser Writes
Greetings one and all! I have E. Kaiser Writes here with us today to talk about a very fun romance archtype known as enemies-to-lovers. Done right, I'll ship a pair of these bantering babies to the moon and back.
E. Kaiser is the author of multiple novels, but most notably the Thaw series, which are spun out of The Snow Queen, and which I'm dying to read someday. She's also a brilliant artist. I mean, just look at her covers - she drew most of them herself!
Love Thy Enemy… Mindfully, And With Logical Progression!
Fiction often deals with the theme of “Friends to Enemies”, possibly most famously in the case of Edmund Dantes in The Count of Monte Cristo, but I find the opposite theme of “Enemies to Friends” to be among the absolute most compelling journey’s I ever read. (One such brief relationship arc between main character David Balfour and the volatile Allan Breck Stewart, in Robert Louis Stevenson’s adventure classic Kidnapped, puts that book among my all time top favorites, ever.)
To me, the best reason to read is to be able to vicariously experience relationships of many different facets, to learn lessons from them that we may have no ability to access in our own lives. But they can so often be applied to our own lives, and that is why I love to read a fresh, out of the box dynamic that takes me by surprise and catches my breath away.
Friendships are my favorite flavor, but many a romance novelist has paid for their bread and butter by penning tangled tales of heartfelt passion... and “Enemies to Lovers” is an equally compelling side of that coin that can really tug the heart strings as well as play quick arpeggios across our most tuneful fears.
(Perhaps the fear response triggered vicariously is almost as delightful to the reading public as any of the emotions... especially when safely confined within the bounds of fiction. Hence Beauty and the Beast as a classic example; Jane Eyre, scares us muchly of Mr. Rochester at first; Phantom of the Opera sets Christine in seriously un-safe positions, and the audience seems to lap it right up. This is probably the root of the popularity of truly un-sound role models, such as many books and films in the recent spotlight, the titles of which I need not name because you can think of a handful straight off the top of your head!)
And while the ease of popularity with this relationship arc is undeniable, I feel that it needs to be handled very carefully indeed or else it slips into the “scary role model” type of tale.
So it’s one of those things, that “if it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well.”
This one is worth doing perfectly!
Potential plot point: people can get the wrong impression of each other’s actions, and can feel threatened/antagonized by what might end up being a simple case of opposing perspectives.
Case Study: in North and South, about the English country preacher’s daughter clashing with her new surroundings in a northern mill town, she views Mr. Thornton’s violent actions at their first encounter as symptoms of a bully and a near maniac.
His motives are eventually revealed, however, as stemming from a fierce fear of fires which can destroy a cotton mill and its workers, at the drop of a spark. His actions are accordingly as furious as his determination is, to keep his mill and his workers safe, and this is indeed a deeply laudable position.
Whereas this misunderstanding sets them at odds with each other at first... they gradually begin to know each other better and the more they learn the more clearly they understand each other’s motives and increasingly respect each other’s guiding principles.
This is exactly the kind of “Enemies to Lovers” journey that is a wonderful role model for anyone to follow, regardless of the nature of any relationship. Keeping a sharp eye to deduce what lies behind people’s actions is inherently wise, and if a story can move us to remember that, it’s well worth the time to tell it.
But the plot points must be laid out very carefully, not just slapped down. In order to build an authentic framework, each misunderstanding needs to spring from entirely relatable misconceptions that the audience can agree that they might themselves fall for.
If you wildly throw artificially contrived events pell-mell at your main characters, the readers will see through it and begin to despise your MCs for being so very shallow and downright stupid at times.
This is always a grave fault in storytelling.
You must start with two people who align so well in deep character traits that they are genuinely a good match for each other, on a very authentic level.
Then the “enemies” part must spring from their simultaneous failure to fully realize the “why” of each other’s actions, and by misjudging each other they dig deeper into the hole.
Once you have their compatibility established apart from each other, and then the channels arranged that will bring their opposing forces rushing toward a collision, half your work is done.
The other half is this: that they must legitimately work through their combined conflicts in a positive way, (while still allowing for lots of wrong starts and hilarious, tense moments) so that when they finally resolve their differences it’s a true “meeting of the minds” and not a cheap “dues ex machina”.
In my book Thaw: Winter Queen I introduce a couple who are truly on the same page in their deepest hearts, but events bring them into complete loggerheads with each other... climaxing in one literally almost killing the other. At that moment they are completely enemies, and as the action slides away into the denouement and wrap-up, they seem set in their conflict forever.
In real life two people like this would probably never meet again, for why should they?
But this being fiction, and not at all real life, we bring them back into contact, looping the threads of their story back into weaving together again. The process of deeper understanding grinds slowly under way in Thaw: Prince of Demargen with the inexorable certainty of a moving glacier; but it won’t be fully resolved until Thaw: Reindeer King releases.
(Apologies to all those waiting, I’m still not sure of a date on that! Thanks, and I love you!)
{The arc works well in any relationship: in my upcoming novel, Thaw: Reindeer King, “lost” childhood friends reconnect as adults in a dramatic way when the one’s hunting dogs try to bring down the other’s pet reindeer, and the deer’s owner kills a dog or so in defense.
Any animal lover can relate to the instant hatred that sparks up immediately over that!
It might seem like an impossible situation, but from each perspective, the friend and their animals were in a life and death situation, and it is only natural that each would strive to preserve the life, and prevent the deaths, of those nearest to them.
Winter in the Great North can be an unforgiving taskmaster.}
Being single myself, I am clinically “not into cardboard romances”... but this arc done well is without a doubt the most pitch-perfect relationship journey I can remember in any book.
The slow burn of it melts the cockles of my heart; the perfectly choreographed, slow dance of two truly well-intentioned hearts seeking the best for those who rely on them, as well as “the greater good”, and working back from the cliff of dramatic confrontation... is really my favorite kind of story.
And when two people realize the qualities that brought them into conflict are also the exact qualities that can render them perfect for each other... well, my particular ‘rom-com-avoiding’ heart just... swoons.
Readers go to romance for encouragement that the somewhat “dead” real world isn’t all there is... and I think it’s important that readers walk away from any tale invigorated to use good tactics on their own life’s problems.
And it is a rare real-life couple who don’t find themselves on the opposite sides of the arguing table from time to time... and positive conflict resolution is the most important thing a romance tale can successfully model.
So write more “Enemies to Lovers” in your stories, but be careful to do it well. Avoid creepiness, Stockholm Syndrome; make the problem real and authentic, and give your MCs lots of hard work to do on themselves before they can climb their way up to the peak where they see they were both headed in the same direction all along.
And that they always will be...
...And that’s a Happily Ever After.
E. Kaiser is the author of multiple novels, but most notably the Thaw series, which are spun out of The Snow Queen, and which I'm dying to read someday. She's also a brilliant artist. I mean, just look at her covers - she drew most of them herself!
E. Kaiser Writes
Christian/Fantasy/Kingdom Fiction/Retellings/Mystery
Author of Thaw
Love Thy Enemy… Mindfully, And With Logical Progression!
Fiction often deals with the theme of “Friends to Enemies”, possibly most famously in the case of Edmund Dantes in The Count of Monte Cristo, but I find the opposite theme of “Enemies to Friends” to be among the absolute most compelling journey’s I ever read. (One such brief relationship arc between main character David Balfour and the volatile Allan Breck Stewart, in Robert Louis Stevenson’s adventure classic Kidnapped, puts that book among my all time top favorites, ever.)
To me, the best reason to read is to be able to vicariously experience relationships of many different facets, to learn lessons from them that we may have no ability to access in our own lives. But they can so often be applied to our own lives, and that is why I love to read a fresh, out of the box dynamic that takes me by surprise and catches my breath away.
Friendships are my favorite flavor, but many a romance novelist has paid for their bread and butter by penning tangled tales of heartfelt passion... and “Enemies to Lovers” is an equally compelling side of that coin that can really tug the heart strings as well as play quick arpeggios across our most tuneful fears.
(Perhaps the fear response triggered vicariously is almost as delightful to the reading public as any of the emotions... especially when safely confined within the bounds of fiction. Hence Beauty and the Beast as a classic example; Jane Eyre, scares us muchly of Mr. Rochester at first; Phantom of the Opera sets Christine in seriously un-safe positions, and the audience seems to lap it right up. This is probably the root of the popularity of truly un-sound role models, such as many books and films in the recent spotlight, the titles of which I need not name because you can think of a handful straight off the top of your head!)
And while the ease of popularity with this relationship arc is undeniable, I feel that it needs to be handled very carefully indeed or else it slips into the “scary role model” type of tale.
So it’s one of those things, that “if it’s worth doing, it’s worth doing well.”
This one is worth doing perfectly!
Potential plot point: people can get the wrong impression of each other’s actions, and can feel threatened/antagonized by what might end up being a simple case of opposing perspectives.
Case Study: in North and South, about the English country preacher’s daughter clashing with her new surroundings in a northern mill town, she views Mr. Thornton’s violent actions at their first encounter as symptoms of a bully and a near maniac.
His motives are eventually revealed, however, as stemming from a fierce fear of fires which can destroy a cotton mill and its workers, at the drop of a spark. His actions are accordingly as furious as his determination is, to keep his mill and his workers safe, and this is indeed a deeply laudable position.
Whereas this misunderstanding sets them at odds with each other at first... they gradually begin to know each other better and the more they learn the more clearly they understand each other’s motives and increasingly respect each other’s guiding principles.
This is exactly the kind of “Enemies to Lovers” journey that is a wonderful role model for anyone to follow, regardless of the nature of any relationship. Keeping a sharp eye to deduce what lies behind people’s actions is inherently wise, and if a story can move us to remember that, it’s well worth the time to tell it.
But the plot points must be laid out very carefully, not just slapped down. In order to build an authentic framework, each misunderstanding needs to spring from entirely relatable misconceptions that the audience can agree that they might themselves fall for.
If you wildly throw artificially contrived events pell-mell at your main characters, the readers will see through it and begin to despise your MCs for being so very shallow and downright stupid at times.
This is always a grave fault in storytelling.
You must start with two people who align so well in deep character traits that they are genuinely a good match for each other, on a very authentic level.
Then the “enemies” part must spring from their simultaneous failure to fully realize the “why” of each other’s actions, and by misjudging each other they dig deeper into the hole.
Once you have their compatibility established apart from each other, and then the channels arranged that will bring their opposing forces rushing toward a collision, half your work is done.
The other half is this: that they must legitimately work through their combined conflicts in a positive way, (while still allowing for lots of wrong starts and hilarious, tense moments) so that when they finally resolve their differences it’s a true “meeting of the minds” and not a cheap “dues ex machina”.
In my book Thaw: Winter Queen I introduce a couple who are truly on the same page in their deepest hearts, but events bring them into complete loggerheads with each other... climaxing in one literally almost killing the other. At that moment they are completely enemies, and as the action slides away into the denouement and wrap-up, they seem set in their conflict forever.
In real life two people like this would probably never meet again, for why should they?
But this being fiction, and not at all real life, we bring them back into contact, looping the threads of their story back into weaving together again. The process of deeper understanding grinds slowly under way in Thaw: Prince of Demargen with the inexorable certainty of a moving glacier; but it won’t be fully resolved until Thaw: Reindeer King releases.
(Apologies to all those waiting, I’m still not sure of a date on that! Thanks, and I love you!)
{The arc works well in any relationship: in my upcoming novel, Thaw: Reindeer King, “lost” childhood friends reconnect as adults in a dramatic way when the one’s hunting dogs try to bring down the other’s pet reindeer, and the deer’s owner kills a dog or so in defense.
Any animal lover can relate to the instant hatred that sparks up immediately over that!
It might seem like an impossible situation, but from each perspective, the friend and their animals were in a life and death situation, and it is only natural that each would strive to preserve the life, and prevent the deaths, of those nearest to them.
Winter in the Great North can be an unforgiving taskmaster.}
Being single myself, I am clinically “not into cardboard romances”... but this arc done well is without a doubt the most pitch-perfect relationship journey I can remember in any book.
The slow burn of it melts the cockles of my heart; the perfectly choreographed, slow dance of two truly well-intentioned hearts seeking the best for those who rely on them, as well as “the greater good”, and working back from the cliff of dramatic confrontation... is really my favorite kind of story.
And when two people realize the qualities that brought them into conflict are also the exact qualities that can render them perfect for each other... well, my particular ‘rom-com-avoiding’ heart just... swoons.
Readers go to romance for encouragement that the somewhat “dead” real world isn’t all there is... and I think it’s important that readers walk away from any tale invigorated to use good tactics on their own life’s problems.
And it is a rare real-life couple who don’t find themselves on the opposite sides of the arguing table from time to time... and positive conflict resolution is the most important thing a romance tale can successfully model.
So write more “Enemies to Lovers” in your stories, but be careful to do it well. Avoid creepiness, Stockholm Syndrome; make the problem real and authentic, and give your MCs lots of hard work to do on themselves before they can climb their way up to the peak where they see they were both headed in the same direction all along.
And that they always will be...
...And that’s a Happily Ever After.
The enemies-to-lovers trope is another of my favorites (particularly the princess-and-rogue-romance subtrope), so I quite enjoyed this post. I especially like the point that the enemies bit should come from the pair misunderstanding each other's actions.
ReplyDeleteThanks for chiming in, Sarah!!!
DeleteYes, that princess and the rogue is a great hook... and pretty well used!
If the conflict is something other than a misunderstanding, then it'll be harder to resolve... and if the problem is deeply opposing internal compasses... then someone "has to change" in order for the romance to work, and I'm always skeptical of "changes brought on by infatuation."
So to have it be a truly rewarding match, they need to be at heart on the same page all along!!! ;-)
I agree that in general, changes caused by infatuation are sketchy. That said, there is one way I think it can work: basically a "beauty and the beast"-type scenario, where one of the characters is able to call the other out on what he or she is doing wrong, and that person changes not because of feelings for the other person but because he or she realizes, "Wow. They're actually right." You can also have something similar when they, as you said, have similar values, but one of them takes those values so far that they become vice and, again, the other person calls the first one out. In both cases, the change isn't because of the romance itself but because the course of the romance put one in a position that the other would listen.
DeleteThat is a true exception, sort of the "Darcy quotient" which modifies the situation... but even though he was being too proud and picky and needed called out on that to reform his ways... the situation was mostly a "misunderstanding of each other", in that they each seemed worse than they actually were at heart.
DeleteSo possibly that doesn't count after all. ;-)
Ooooh...! Glad to hear you're dying to read the Thaw books, Kendra!!!! Hopefully you'll be able to survive long enough to do so! :-)
ReplyDeleteIt's a pretty fun ride, if I do say so myself, and I'm looking forward to wrapping it up in Reindeer King in (hopefully) not too long!!! :-)
You can whet your appetite with the snippet I've posted on my blog, for reference in this post!
I LOVE the snarky word banter that comes with this type of romance. I get such giggles out of watching them slug words back and forth KNOWING the whole time they're going to end up together in the end.
ReplyDeleteYes, that tension is great fun to watch, when you know things that they don't! ;-)
DeleteGreat post, enemies to lovers romances can be very fun! But you bring up a great point that they can set a dangerous example if not handled carefully. I adore North and South :)
ReplyDeleteYes, it's a tricky slope to navigate! But all romances have the power to demonstrate good, healthy relationship dynamics, or un-healthy ones... so I think it's important to take that seriously!
DeleteAnd yes, that's just such a great movie. :-)
"Love Thy Enemy… Mindfully, And With Logical Progression!" <---- Oh gracious, that made me laugh ;D. I loved what you said at the end about avoiding creepiness - I hate it when two people are enemies FOR GOOD REASON and ... then ending up liking each other. When really they shouldn't because one of the two of them is a creep ;D. Thanks for this epic post, E. Kaiser!
ReplyDelete~ Savannah
Inspiring Writes
HAhah!!! :-) Glad I could make you laugh!! I try to put the truth in the spotlight, then give it a wry twist on the side!
DeleteAnd yes, so many relationships fall into a 'bad place'... and that's such a waste of effort on the part of the author, and the reader!!!
I also hate the "one of them is a creep"!!! feeling. ;-)
Haha, well, since our hate is mutual, I'm sure there won't be any of that in YOUR books - which means I really should check them out! I've honestly been meaning to read your series for some time now, the covers are beautiful ;)
Delete~ Savannah
Inspiring Writes
Oh, thank you so much for the compliment on the covers!!! I actually receive quite a bit of "Oh, they're kid's books!!!" from those covers, which is disheartening. So... that's a quandary for another day.
DeleteGlad they struck a chord with you!!!
And yes, you can be assured that NONE of my MCs will be total creeps. ;-) Though I may have some characters mistakenly assume something of the sort of someone else, from time to time. The reactions from wrong assumptions being set right is great story fodder!!!
And I think that sort of reaction tells a whole lot about a person... whether they are able to re-configure their opinions once their first impression is proved wrong... or if they are so embarrassed they just do through life insisting they were right.
And that's a lot of drama, too! (It's just occurred to me that one of my characters is doing exactly this, and has been for a couple of books!! Wow, that's a great moment of clarity... let's see if I can't really amp up that revelation in this instance!!! )
The Winter Queen is definitely my favorite cover, its stunning <3. Who designed the covers for you?
DeleteHaha, yay! ;D "Or if they are so embarrassed they just do through life insisting they were right." <---- OH gracious, I very much relate to characters who have to fight THAT reaction, ha - sometimes I can be quite stubborn xD. And HURRAH for sudden clarity! Are you working on the first draft of a WIP right now?
~ Savannah
Inspiring Writes
Oh, glad that you liked Winter Queen!!! She is one of my favorite characters, and her foibles are close to mine, so she's easy to write!!! ;-)
DeleteAw... well, I figure stubborness is just tenacity doing the wrong thing. ;-) You know? Being tenacious is important in life, but if we get tenacious about the wrong thing, then that's 'stubborn'. ;-)
So I try to call myself "tenacious" and live properly in that light!
I"m actually in the midst of several... I'm a non-chronologicl order writer, so my creativity skips from scene to scene regardless of where they fall, or which book they're in! So I always have several WIPs "in play".
The one this particular character is in is part of the fairytale series, and it's been going on for some time, but I only just now realize exactly WHY it was happening. And that inspiration is exactly the fit... that's the core issue in that heart!!!
Getting over that issue will be the tricky part!!! ;-)
(And, I do all my own covers, with help from my Abi-sis. She sweats over them in Photoshop, making my original art much shinier!!! :-) Also she's my "first eyes" and advice giver: she is also my line-in cheerleader, whip cracker and slave driver when it comes to writing, so she's as much invested in the process as I am, pretty much! She doesn't write, nor wishes to, but she's a great help and support in my bookish progress! She's the one I wrote Jeweler's Apprentice for, {when she turned 16} and that investment has paid off with a lifelong burden of "Finish this book! Also, this book! Oh, how far are you coming along on these five?" ;-) But I can't complain!!! She's a true blessing, and reads over all my WIPs before final betas, as she's better at "organizing" than I am by that stage. Fresh minds are a blessing there!!!)
"I figure stubborness is just tenacity doing the wrong thing." Oooh, I've never thought about it that way - wow, I like that much better! I'll certainly be viewing it your way now ;D
DeleteWHOA, you designed your OWN covers (with the help of your sister ;))? GO YOU, girl! My sister is exactly the same for me, she's always ready to beta-read my things. Aren't sisters epic? I'm so glad you have someone like that to encourage you with your stories!
~ Savannah
Inspiring Writes
yes, indeed, congenial sisters of a kindred spirit stripe are indeed epic!!! Also, hard to find, so they deserve all the love and devotion we can repay them with!!! ;-)
DeleteSome people have suggested we ought to have photo-manip covers, so we're actually dabbling our fingers in that water... but, the faces just can't BE the characters in quite the same way.
We shall see...